ShmoopTube

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[Coop and Dino singing]

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Conversations are great. They’re a big part of how we connect to people. [Boy and girl on a see-saw]

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“Oh, you love Shmoop? Me, too!” Bam! Instant friendship.

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But it’s not always so simple. Sometimes you have a – dun, dun, dun – disagreement. [Girl hurt on the floor]

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And then what?

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Well, we’re here to let you know that a disagreement doesn't mean you have to end

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your friendship and move to a different city. Follow these tips, and you should be able [Girl packing a suitcase]

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to move on… without actually having to move. The first thing to keep in mind is that people

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often disagree when they don't share the same opinion. And that's completely fine.

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It might not feel great, but it’s okay.

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Opinions aren't hard facts that everyone needs to agree on––they're shaped by people's [Coop discussing opinions]

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perspectives and their experiences, which means that everybody can have a different

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one.

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With that in mind, it's always a good idea to hear people out on why they hold certain

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opinions. What makes them feel the way that they do? What experiences have they had that [Man and woman in a coffee store]

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support that opinion? You'll only find out if you listen.

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And that's not just true about other people's opinions, but your own as well. If someone

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doesn't agree with you, you should be just as willing to talk them through why you hold [Girl getting a haircut]

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that opinion. Even things that are incredibly clear to you might be news to someone else.

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And when stating your opinions, it's a good idea to make clear that they are, in fact, [Man sits on a chair by a PC]

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opinions. You can do this with phrases like: "In my opinion…" or "In my experience…"

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or even "I think that…"

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So instead of saying, “Harry OBVIOUSLY should have ended up with Hermione,” just throw

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an “I think” in there, and boom: less people will get mad at you.

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Well…maybe just stay away from Harry Potter fans in general. They're a pretty loyal bunch. [Person in wizard robes makes man levitate]

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That brings us to a very important thing you can do to help navigate your way through a

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disagreement: be nice.

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Yup. It's that simple.

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Disagreements are no excuse to be disagreeable. Sure, it’s easy to get mad and call somebody [Tomato hits man in the face]

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a “poop-face,” but… maybe try not to.

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Even if it's kind of funny, it’s not very nice and it’s certainly not winning you

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any persuasion points.

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Because guess what: it’s a lot easier to convince somebody you’re right when they

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like you. And if you follow all these steps and still [Coop teaching how to handle disagreements]

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don’t reach an agreement, that’s totally fine.

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It’s actually a good thing to learn how to do in life. Agree to disagree, get some

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ice cream together, and move on.

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And one last pro-tip: rocky road is a great flavor for moving past arguments. [Boys ice cream falls on the floor]

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But of course, that's just our opinion.

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