The Crystal Cave Fear Quotes
How we cite our quotes: (Book.Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #1
Not a shriek of pain, but worse, the sound of a man in mortal fear. I thought the cry contained a word, as if the terror was shaped, but it was no word that I knew. The scream rose unbearably, as if it would burst him, then was chopped off sharply, as if by a blow on the throat. (II.8.34)
From a distance, Merlin witnesses a human sacrifice carried out by the druids. Although he's young, he understands what the scream of the victim really means. Interestingly, Merlin's not alarmed by the terrified victim. He's actually pretty excited by the fear in the air.
Weird, perhaps. But remember that Merlin's in the business of grabbing power wherever he can. Somehow, he understands that the druids' practices will give him access to an ancient (though creepy) source of power.
Quote #2
I sat up straight. The heat ran over my skin in little waves, like catspaws of wind over water. My breathing came shallow and fast. For a moment I wondered if this was fear, then I knew it was still excitement. (II.8.43)
It's a little odd that Merlin can't figure out whether or not he's frightened as he listens to the druids murdering a victim. But remember: Merlin's not like other kiddos. He is an agent of Fate, just waiting for "the god" to put him on the path to greater knowledge and power. He understands that this terrifying experience will be all for the good, since it will lead to more knowledge. Shady, but there it is.
Quote #3
"I thought once that I was better than other boys because there were so many of their fears I couldn't share or understand. I had others of my own, of course, but I learned to keep them to myself. I suppose that was a kind of pride. But now I am beginning to understand why, even when danger and death lie openly waiting in the path, I can walk straight by them." (II.10.43)
Merlin explains to Cadal that he's not actually brave at all. Why? Because he doesn't feel fear like other people do. Since Merlin has knowledge of the future, he knows that the dangers he walks into won't be fatal to him. Without fear for his life, Merlin reasons, he can't ever be called brave for facing danger. Cadal's still impressed—as are we.
Quote #4
"I think what men fear is the unknown. They fear pain and death, because these may be waiting round any corner. But there are times when I know what is hidden, and waiting, or when—I told you—I see it lying straight in the pathway. And I know where pain and danger lie for me, and I know that death is not yet to come; so I am not afraid. This isn't courage." (II.10.45).
Merlin reveals the source of his confidence: he knows that he's not going to die anytime soon. His reflections on the nature of fear show him to be a perceptive and humble guy. It's not a matter of courage, he tells Belasius. Merlin knows that he's been born for a purpose, and that purpose has not yet been fulfilled. No need to fear—yet.
Quote #5
"It frightens me, too. You're right, that's how it feels, as if I were an empty shell with something working through me. I say things, I see things, think things, till that moment I never knew of. But you're wrong in thinking I don't feel. It hurts me. I think this may be because I can't command whatever speaks through me…" (II.11.71)
Merlin tries to explain to Cadal how it feels to have a vision or some other communication with "the god." It's not pretty. Merlin makes it clear that he's never in control in these situations and that his individuality is also somehow taken away from him.
He may not fear death or torture, but this experience does terrify him. Also, this is the first hint we get that Merlin feels pain whenever he's possessed by "the god." He'll have more experience with this later, when he makes his prophecy for Vortigern.
Quote #6
But the power had gone and there was no help here from the god; I did not even know if I was man enough for what might happen after she told them. I dared not speak again; I was afraid that if they used force against me she would speak to save me. And once they knew, once they started to question me… (III.7.41)
Merlin finds himself in a miserable situation before Vortigern. His mother is being forced to reveal the identity of Merlin's father, and he can do nothing to flip the tables in their favor. If Niniane tells the truth, Ambrosius' life and ambitions for Britain will be in danger. If she refuses, they'll both die.
At seventeen, Merlin's already supposed to be a pretty big deal. He's smart and tall. He's a prince. He's got a personal in with "the god." But even with all these advantages, he can't escape the sword sticking in his side and Vortigern's kingly power. Panic rightly sets in.
Quote #7
There was sweat on his face, and I saw his hands twitch on the arms of the chair. The man was humming like a harp-string. The tension ran right through the hall, almost visibly. I felt my skin prickle, and a cold wolfspaw of fear walked up my spine. (III.7.44)
Merlin and Niniane face the angry Vortigern, who has demanded to know the name of Merlin's father. Niniane's playing it cool, but Vortigern's about to pop. Merlin understands what the anger of a desperate king can mean, and he feels fearful and panicky. Note that he describes his fear as a "wolfspaw"—a nice reference to Vortigern and the Saxons, who are called wolves by their detractors.
Quote #8
They had moved back from me, no doubt afraid to stand so near a demon's child. At his sign they closed in again. The man on right still held his sword drawn, but down by his side and out of my mother's view. It was not quite steady. The man on my left surreptitiously loosened his own blade in its sheath. Both men were breathing heavily, and I could smell fear on them. (III.7.21)
Merlin has a new power: other people's fear about his unknown parentage. Niniane confirms what Vortigern thinks he knows about Merlin—that his dad is a demon. She uses the old story to protect Ambrosius—and Merlin as well. She doesn't yet know that she's played right into Vortigern's hands: he wants Merlin to be demon spawn, because his priests have told him that they need such a child's blood to make the tower stand.
This scene shows us how quickly fear can shift in a tense situation. Just moments before, Merlin panicked at the thought of Vortigern learning his parentage. Now Vortigern and his men get their turn, as they think they are in the presence of a supernatural being.
Quote #9
I could see that the fear was not of the King's anger at what had happened to the work, but of the force which they believed in and did not understand. (III.10.8)
Merlin recognizes the danger of believing in things you don't understand: it brings fear that you can't control. He sees it in Vortigern's men, who believe that a man can be born with a demon for a father, even though they don't really understand how such a thing can be. This is also a chance for Stewart to get in a sting at superstitious people.
Quote #10
[…] her body drew me into that tight and final darkness, no air, no light, no breath, no whisper of waking spirit. A grave inside a grave. Fear burned down into my brain like a white hot blade laid across the eyes. I opened them and could see nothing but the spinning light and the shadow of a tree laid across me whose thorns were like spikes. Some shape of terror clawed at my face. (IV.8.39)
So Merlin finds himself hooking up with the girl of his dreams in a meadow near his cave. Everything's going great—until Merlin gets one of his stupid premonitions. And this one's a doozy. As you can see, the mostly invulnerable young man feels that his girl is drawing him into death.
Now, we're pretty sure there's a lot of Freudian stuff going on here, but let's just take it at face value. In other Arthurian legends, we learn that Merlin is vanquished by a woman he can't resist. We're pretty certain this is a foreshadowing of bad relationships to come.