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Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk Chapter 16 Summary

How It All Goes Down

Will Slay Vampires For Food

  • The boys are back in their seats, in the awful freezing rain, watching a super boring game, and they are all realizing they really don't want to be there.
  • Billy tells Mango he's in love with Faison. Mango is like: dude, duh.
  • Sykes is serenading the crowd around them with Tina Turner songs. Rumor has it Dime gave him a Valium, and now he's the happiest guy in the stadium.
  • An unknown number calls Billy's phone, but he lets it go to voicemail. It's the Austin people.
  • Billy thinks he needs to make a bracelet: WWSD. What Would Shroom Do?
  • For a minute, Billy lets himself picture what would happen if he took the Austin people up on their offer. He fantasizes about the ideal ranch life, with Faison and a bunch of happy dogs by his side.
  • Sykes's screeching brings Billy back to the present, where Lodis is so passed out that a dusting of sleet has gathered on his shoulders.
  • A nice lady in front of the Bravos notices Lodis and wonders how he can possibly be sleeping. And why aren't they all wearing coats?
  • The lady refuses to believe that Lodis is comfortable, so she wraps him in a Snuggie.
  • The guys make Lodis a sign that says "Homeless Vet—Will Slay Vampires For Food. Have a Blessed Day" and prop it under his chin. Hehehe.
  • Mango is trying to convince Billy to sleep with Faison—somehow—before they ship off again. He argues that the odds of her wanting to wait for Billy for a whole year are slim, at best.
  • Kathryn calls Billy; he ignores her.
  • Kathryn texts Billy to call the Austin people. He listens to the voicemail from them again, instead.
  • Dime comes over to huddle near Billy because Sykes is driving him nuts. So Billy picks his brain about the whole thing, under a hypothetical guise.
  • Dime insists that the Bravos don't have a choice about going back to Iraq, so even contemplating the alternative is irrelevant.
  • Dime gets a phone call about the movie, and whoever's on the other end says he wants to have a meeting with Dime and Billy.
  • Josh is coming to get Dime and Billy for a meeting with Norm. Here we go.