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Source: None
Speaker: Mark Twain
The only two certainties in life are death and taxes.
Context
This is a misquote often attributed to Mark Twain.
We're not sure how this quote ended up being misattributed to Mark Twain, but this pithy phrase was around before Twain was even born. The earliest variation that we found was from Christopher Bullock's The Cobbler of Preston in 1716. That author wrote, "'Tis impossible to be sure of any thing but Death and Taxes." After him, Edward Ward, Daniel Defoe, and Benjamin Franklin also spun their own variations on this classic line. Hey, a good political joke never dies.
Where you've heard it
This isn't a real cheery quote, so you've probably heard people mention it when referring to the sad, but inescapable truths in life. You can't keep from dying… or paying your taxes. Bummer.
Additional Notable References:
- Daniel Defoe wrote, "Things as certain as Death and Taxes, can be more firmly believed" in 1726.
- Ben Franklin recorded in a letter, "In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes" in 1789.
- Death and Taxes is the name of Dorothy Parker's 1931 poetry collection.
- In Gone with the Wind, the author remarks, "Death, taxes, and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them."
- This phrase has become so common it has its own TV trope page!
Pretentious Factor
If you were to drop this quote at a dinner party, would you get an in-unison "awww" or would everyone roll their eyes and never invite you back? Here it is, on a scale of 1-10.
If you let out this sage piece of advice, no one around will think you're pretentious. Mostly, they'll just think you're right.